On Poker, Marines and Stripping the Military Hunks of Their Money and Their Dignity

Long before televised Texas Hold ‘Em tournaments made poker all the rage in every frat house from Seattle to Charleston and back again, I was dealing out hands of Follow the Queens and Black Mariah in my parents’ living room. Poker has been the game of choice in my family for years, and I was practicing my poker face long before I took the training wheels off my first bike.

I love a good game of poker. Unfortunately, I don’t often get to play. When I am not visiting my family in California, a good old-fashioned game of five card draw is hard to find.

The last time I can remember getting really down and dirty at a poker table that was not surrounded by my relatives was a summer night back in college. My roommate was dating this girl who had a roommate that was engaged to this extremely sexy Marine.

She was a lucky little minx, but that story is for another post.

One night my roommate’s girlfriend called to see if I would be up for a game of poker. Seemed the sexy Marine was having a few of his military buddies over for a game, and they were short a guy. She knew I was a card shark and suggested they invite me. Being manly men in uniform, they were all too anxious to have a gay guy fill in. I think they figured I was easy money.

They were dead wrong.

I cleaned up at that table. By the time the night was over, I had taken the money and the dignity of four of the hottest Marines to ever enlist. One hunk was particularly bothered by my kicking his military butt all over the poker table. He kept claiming I was just getting lucky. All I could do was laugh. Someone who was taught to play poker by his grandmother at the age of five doesn’t need luck. He’s got skill enough to take on any Marine any time.

And next time he knows to insist on a game of strip poker.